Draw me!

Finger painting in oils of Christ Crucified

The paintings and drawings I have rendered of Christ far outnumber anything else I have done. He keeps popping up. The first one was a black and white image I dabbed onto some cartridge paper using powder paints mixed with water. I only had a box af black and a box of white. At that point I had very few art supplies, and no brushes. I ended up using some cut up, old laddered tights to apply the paint as I was inspired to paint there and then and could not wait to have a day off and go shopping for brushes. Something drove me to create in that moment. I still have that first image. A miracle, as I have moved so many times I was convinced it was lost till I found it tucked in an old folder of early paintings.

Early painting of Christ discovered with powder paints

Christ appears and never leaves

This image still holds my attention. He is very intent and his gaze searches my soul. He says to me, "I am here." And he has remained ever since. My buddy in art. My friend in life. My support in dark times. And once in a while, just a tad demanding.

After creating the image on the right I did not paint much for some years, though there were a few experiments with more coloured powder paints. I enjoyed just throwing on the paint and seeing what came out. Working and survival took precedence but many years later I began to find the time to paint more and taught myself how to use oil paints and how to stretch canvases - badly. But painting on canvas was such a joy after painting on oil boards. Canvas has bounce and life, it seems to give something to the process. I started to investigate many kinds of expression using various media and even offered my services as an artist to do some ten minute portraits to raise money for a local project in Lewes.

Draw Me!

Why oh why did I volunteer to do this? I was petrified and drawing a sketch of a stranger in such a small amount of time was not something I had done before. Was I mad? Three days before the event I had a dream so vivid I can remember it in detail, as if I had just woken.

I was sitting at a desk with pencils and paper. Christ walked in, you know, as he does, and he had a young man with dark hair and beard accompanying him. He stood in front of me and pushed a piece of paper towards me and said, "Draw me." I did that self effacing thing, like, "I couldn't possibly draw you!" but the look in his eye was having none of it and I just shrugged my shoulders and said okay.

After a while I was in the groove and enjoying the work. It was not a bad likeness. He took it up in his hands. This is where, in my dream, all I could see were those hands. They seemed to emanate immense love. He crumpled the paper into a ball, opened up his palms and revealed a communion wafer.

"This is my covenant with you. Draw me!" Then he turned to walk away with his companion. In my dream I thought, hang on, this is too good an opportunity to pass up.

"Hey!" I shouted, "Can you tell me what...." the 'what' I have no memory of but he turned and looked at me as if I was a naughty child then came and whispered to me the secret of something before he left.

A time of waiting and then a time of creating

You would think I would get straight to it after such an experience but something held me back. Sitting in my apartment some two years later and looking at a blank canvas I felt an energy. I started smearing oil paint on with my fingers and three hours later the image at the top of this blog appeared looking soulfully at me with such tenderness. This canvas is still in my possession; a bit worn now but He remains with me always.

I began working on more Biblical stories and imagery, developing and learning new skills until I discovered iconography. My spiritual journey and my artistic journey were entwined, feeding each other. It was art for the soul not art for wordly recognition and gain, though i have done some amazing projects and commissions over the decades.

Painting has accompanied me all my life and it is a constant, as Christ is a constant. And He loves everything I do and I do not have to measure up to anyone or anything else, just to keep moving forward and using my hands to create.

I am living the life of an artist. That is enough.

I did do the ten minute portraits. It went exceptionally well. I was busy for the whole session and never drew so many babies. Thankfully it was the Mayor of Lewes at the time who wanted to be first sitter and got people interested. He was not a baby by the way.

The Artist

December 2025